The Birds and the Bees
by AKA DD
Summary: Max and Alec have a little talk with Ralph and Bullet about the birds and the bees...ALTERNATE ENDING, now posted!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Dark Angel doesn't belong to me. This isn't being done for profit, so lay off. I'm stressed.**

**A/N: This was a story that came to me after an enlightening conversation with my fifteen-year-old cousin. I thought it was hilarious. And I tried to recreate it with Max and Alec. Hope you guys enjoy the awkwardness of it all. Please read and review. Oneshot standalone…etc, meaning this is pretty much it.**

**The Birds and The Bees**

"Umm…Max?"

Max Guevara looked up from the paperwork on her desk and smiled slightly at the owner of the voice. "Yeah, Ralph?"

Ralph, a blond, blue-eyed, young X6 looked shyly at Max. "I…uh, I mean, we…me and Bullet, we got something to ask you…" she stammered.

Max raised her eyebrows in surprise. Ralph was having a hard time looking her in the eye, and she noticed that Bullet, was right behind the young girl, sort of looking down at his feet. She had worked with these kids before, just after Manticore had burned down. She had known them to be self-sufficient and fairly confident in their skills. She wondered what was going down that would make this girl stammer with shyness.

She put down her pen, and pushed the budget reports away from her. "'Bout what?" her tone was a little bit sharper than she had intended, but she was hoping that nothing had gone wrong with the simple heist that she had sent a bunch of X6's on earlier that evening.

"C…could…we come in first?" ventured Ralph.

Max nodded cautiously. Now, she was really starting to worry. What was going on?

The two young transgenics shuffled inside her already small office, making the space seem very tight. Max looked closely at them, marveling at the changes one year had wrought.

Ralph, who had always been quite pretty, was now a certified beauty at age 17. She had let her blond hair grow out, her blue eyes seemed more vivid, and her features more defined. Beside her, Bullet, had grown at least another four inches, skimming six feet, and had started to fill out his once-lanky form.

They had come back from Canada, along with their rag-tag unit, to be in Terminal City. Max hadn't had the heart to turn them away, even though she knew the kids were much safer in Canada.

Max looked at them curiously, slightly apprehensive. "Well? Care to fill me in on what's going on?"

Ralph and Bullet exchanged sheepish glances at each other. Max was surprised to realize that Ralph was actually turning a certain shade of crimson. She was…_blushing?_

Bullet ran a hand through his light brown hair and cleared his throat. "We didn't know who else we could ask…I mean, we've always thought of you as…y'know…our leader…"

"…but also like our big sister," finished Ralph, her eyes glancing hopefully at Max.

Max smiled widely, pleased at this. It was nice to know that people looked up to her as something more than just TC's fearless bitch leader. In fact, it was also a nice feeling not to be the baby all the time, as she was with her unit.

"So…?" she prodded them.

Ralph and Bullet glanced nervously at each other again, making Max want to butt their heads together just so they would get on with it.

"We wanted to ask you about..." started Bullet, but he faltered.

"What we mean is…tell us about…'gettin' busy,'" finished Ralph, her voice coming out in a breathless rush.

Max stared at them in shock. "Gettin' busy?" she asked incredulously. _They couldn't possibly mean… _"Say _what_, again?"

This time, even Bullet had turned scarlet. He ducked his head in embarrassment, and scratched his head. "Umm…y'know…gettin' it on…um…"

"Sex," Ralph blurted out. Then her eyes bugged out and she looked away, her ears were now burning.

Max was floored to say the least. _The two of 'em? Trying to get it on? Shit._

She could only think of one thing to say at that moment. "Wait here, I'm getting Alec."

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"Alec! I want you with me now!" cried Max, kicking his office door open. This time, it was Alec McDowell who had to look up from his paper work, a slow grin of amusement on his face.

"I've been waiting forever for you to say those exact words to me, Maxie," he drawled, as he leaned back casually on his chair.

Max glared at him, "As if!" she spat out. And he just smiled wider. God, she was a sight at the moment. Her bronze skin was slightly flushed, her dark brown eyes were glowing, and she seemed just a little bit agitated. Something was obviously bothering her. _Wait…she couldn't be…_he sniffed the air discreetly…_nope_. She wasn't in heat. He exhaled slightly—he wasn't sure if he was particularly disappointed or relieved.

"Shut up!" she said her tone annoyed.

He raised his arms in mock surrender. "Didn't say anything,"

"Yeah, but you were _thinking_ something," she commented wryly, arching an eyebrow at him. "I know that look."

"Aw, c'mon, Max. Now you're gonna try to tell me to shut my thoughts up, too?"

"If only I could." She retorted.

He shrugged. "Would you believe that I was thinking about the layout plans for next week's heist on the Museum of Modern Art?" he asked innocently.

She frowned at him, her expression conveying that she didn't believe him at all. "Riiight. And I was thinking of getting into a threesome with Jade and Quinn." She drawled sarcastically.

"Well, I _was_ thinking about the museum…" he lied. _Before you walked into my office_. "But your thoughts are way better than mine, Maxie…I mean, who knew what a dirty mind you actually had. In fact, maybe I'd like to up the ante and make it a foursome, hmm?" he finished, smiling suggestively at her.

"Oh, you're sick!" she cried. "I was being sarcastic!"

He smirked at her ire. "Yeah, well, it's not sarcastic anymore, when you have to point out that it was sarcasm. That's just sad."

She glared daggers at him, and he thanked God that he was too far for her to smack. Then Max seemed to sag a little as she sighed loudly. "Actually, that's exactly why I need you to come with me."

"What, that your sarcastic wit sucks and you need lessons?"

This time, she didn't care that there was an entire desk between them. She leaned over and smacked him upside the head. "No, because _you_ have a dirty mind!"

"OW! I was _joking_!" he cried, indignantly, rubbing his ear slightly.

Max stared witheringly at him. "Yeah, well it's not a joke anymore when you have to point it out." She bit out, using his own words.

Alec just chuckled easily. He really loved these strange encounters with Max. She was so easily riled up, so easily ticked off…so easily aroused to…heck, so easily aroused. Period. He wondered if she would be that responsive in bed. He swallowed painfully at the thought, forcing himself to even out his breathing and regulate his blood flow. _Damn, Alec, you know better than to go down that road_.

Max was looking at him oddly. "What's wrong with you? Cat got your tongue?"

"Yeah, something like that," he choked out.

She shrugged, then looked at something that was just over his head. Alec glanced suspiciously over his head. "What?"

"I need you to come with me to my office," she said, her voice small and slightly uncomfortable. "I have a…situation…that might be right up your alley."

He leaned his arms on this desk and peered up at Max—who still wouldn't look him in the eye. What was so interesting about his wall? He smirked at her. "And exactly what is right up my alley?"

Finally, she looked back down at him, her eyes burning fiercely. "Don't make me say it," she said.

"Say what?"

"Sex. Okay? It's right up your alley."

Alec almost fell off his chair. "You want me to go to your office for sex? I mean, shit, we could do it right here, right now, if that's what you want…"

She looked at him incredulously. But she could feel herself getting all hot, her face burning and her skin tingling. "What! No!" she cried out. "I mean…I mean…I need you…to…" she stammered. "I need you to talk to Ralph and Bullet about it."

Alec could barely contain the grin that was pushing its way onto his handsome face. He was vaguely disappointed, but he knew that wasn't what Max had meant. He just liked to rile her. Besides, he already knew Max didn't want him that way.

The way he wanted her.

He felt a little stab in his heart, but let it slide. It wouldn't do him well to dwell on such inevitabilities. He'd learned to live with the strange little friendship he had with Max. It would have to be enough for him.

Then he frowned, slightly. "Why exactly would you think that sex was right up my alley?"

She rolled her eyes at him. "I'd think that the answer would be obvious," she retorted.

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Max finally got Alec to come with her to her office. She was fuming, figuratively and literally. She couldn't believe how _hot_ she'd felt at his words. To top it off, she knew that he had just been kidding, riling her up as usual. And that was what had set her, well…fuming.

She knew she shouldn't have felt that way. It wasn't like they were like _that_. Alec was just an accomplished flirt. He knew exactly what to say to make a woman all self-consciously flustered. That was probably why he had so many women throwing themselves at him.

That, and the fact that he was indecently good-looking. His dark blond hair had grown longer than the Manticore buzz-cut and it curled…for God's sakes it _curled_, in that adorably fly-away fashion that made her just want to run her hands through it and fix it. And those damn hazel-green eyes. All round and beautiful and expressive. Who in the world had the right to eyes like those? And then there were those chiseled lips. Yes, _chiseled_. Max had snuck in a few romance novel reading time (a girl's gotta get her fix somehow), every time she ran past the line "chiseled lips", Alec's lips would pop into her mind. Now, _those_ were chiseled lips. Take that Duke of Something or Other.

Max sighed wearily at her thoughts. Whatever she may feel about Alec, she was physically attracted to him. It wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Except for the fact that she knew he didn't feel the same way. He always had a different woman with him every night, either transgenic or ordinary. But he always held _her_ an arm's length away. Well, maybe it was because she smacked him so many times, but really, he was always asking for it with his stupid comments.

"So, what exactly do you want me to tell them?" he asked, as he followed closely behind her.

She shrugged and looked back at him. "I dunno. Maybe about how it's something special and all that…"

"Are you nuts!" Alec paused in his walking. "I'm not exactly the best spokesperson for the "special" and "intimate" part of having sex, especially after you've showed me how _obvious_ it was that sex was right up my alley," he pointed out.

Max turned around and faced him, her arms crossed over her chest. "You're the expert at this."

"I don't know if I should be insulted," he said dryly, "or complimented that I'd be such an _expert_."

Max rolled her eyes, even though he couldn't see. "I meant expert at _yapping_," she snapped. "Honestly, just tell 'em what they wanna hear. Like how good it's supposed to feel, and all."

"As opposed to how 'not good' it _actually_ feels?" he quipped, picking up on her use of the word 'supposed'.

"Whatever!"

"Max, I dunno who you've been with, but I can tell you, that they must've been seriously lacking to satisfy your…uh…nature."

She turned around and punched him on the stomach. Hard.

He doubled over in pain. Gasping. "What the hell--?"

"Shut-up!" Then she spun around quickly, whipping his incredulous face with her long hair.

He flinched, but followed her to her office.

They got there and found Ralph and Bullet standing nervously against one wall. They snapped to attention at the entrance of their senior officers.

"At ease, kids," said Alec. "This ain't Manticore."

They looked up at Alec, and Ralph blushed. He had that effect on the entire female population, apparently. Max almost rolled her eyes, but stopped herself. She was supposed to be a role model after all.

"So," started Alec, as he shut the door behind him. "What exactly is this all about?"

"Well, sir, we wanted to know about sex," started Bullet.

Alec nodded understandingly. "Are you two…together, or something?"

Ralph blushed prettily. "Yes, sir." She said, then glanced swiftly, uncertainly at Bullet. But Bullet just smiled at her and nodded in the affirmative.

Max thought that it was so sweet. She felt a small pang in her heart. She'd really missed out on young love, what with all the running and hiding and all. And then, there was Logan.

Which had turned out to be a bust. They had drawn out the waiting part so long, that in the end, even with the virus cured, they just didn't have the sizzle anymore. They were as flat as days old soda. Needless to say, they had parted amiably and had stayed friends.

Unfortunately, Logan had moved on with Asha…and she had been left to sneak in romance novels in her spare time.

"We were not of age to be informed of the rites of copulation while at Manticore, sir," explained Bullet.

Alec raised his eyebrows. "First of all, drop the sir. And secondly, I guess we'd have to start from the beginning," he sighed. He shoved his hands down his pants pockets and rocked on his heels. He suddenly didn't know what else to say. _How to begin_…he glanced swiftly at Max.

"I'm assuming you guys know the basics…right? The birds and the bees?" she ventured into the conversation.

Ralph shrugged. "We had sex education at the age of twelve. We were taught about sperm, ovulation, fertilization and the development of embryos. We were taught of certain…characteristics of the male and female anatomy and their designated functions."

"Huh."

"Right. But you were too young to be initiated into the Breeding Program, I understand," said Alec.

"There was no Breeding Program until after we blew up the lab," pointed out Max.

"Yeah, but the rest of us had outside mission _perks_…" explained Alec. "I mean, when our handlers thought we were ready, we were, uh, _exposed_ to the _practice_ to develop the _know_-_how_ in case it was ever significant in a mission."

Max looked at him with something akin to disgust on her face. "Well, what was _your_ first time like?" he asked pointedly.

Max had the decency to look away. "It should've been special," she said, in a voice so low, only Alec who was standing right next to her heard. He glanced sharply down at the wistfulness in her voice. What did she mean by that?

Then she looked keenly at the two X6's. "If you two are sure about this…"

Bullet and Ralph glanced uneasily at each other, and nodded.

"…then, I think that the way it goes is to just follow your instincts." She finished.

Alec was nodding along, but kept his gaze on Max. She was looking a little sad, and for the life of him, he didn't understand why.

"If you trust each other, then that's all that matters," she was continuing. "Because that means that you'll want it to be…perfect. I mean, my first time was…nothing."

"What do you mean?" asked Ralph.

"I was fourteen, and well, I was in heat," explained Max, her voice calm and soft. Alec's irises widened slightly. _Fourteen? She had been fourteen? Damn._ But he kept his incredulous thoughts to himself.

"What's heat?" asked Ralph, curiously.

"It's something that Manticore fixed with you guys X6 series and up, but all X5 females go into 'heat'—as a result of the cat DNA. It's basically the reproductive cycle kicking in. It only happens a few times each year, about three or four times," explained Alec in an oddly paternal Discovery Channel kind of tone.

"So…what does that have anything to do with sex?"

"It basically means that I _crave_ it…and can't really control myself. I never had anyone tell me what was going on with my body…and what these feelings were. Next thing, I knew, I'd jumped a guy and lost my virginity." She smiled regretfully at the memory.

Alec just looked at Max, an odd expression on his face. His eyes were slightly shuttered, like he was hiding some emotion behind their green gold depths.

Max swallowed and looked away from himm. "Not to say, that it didn't feel good…" she faltered.

Luckily, Alec happily jumped into the conversation. "Yeah, because the best part about…doing it…" he said, a smirk on his face. Then he glanced down at Max, and added, "…with someone you _care_ about," he almost choked on the words. "…is that it feels good."

Then he smirked that Alec smirk again, "It feels _real_ good."

"Yeah, but don't just do it for the heck of it," Max butt in hastily, before Alec could give them bad tom-cat advice.

"What do you mean don't do it for the heck of it. You just told the kids it felt good. What's wrong with experiencing the pleasure as much as they can?" asked Alec, a small frown marring his perfect features.

Max groaned. "I meant, don't get pressured into doing it, just 'cuz you think you ought to be at this point in your relationship. It has to feel right."

"So, you're saying that we should…love…each other first?" asked Bullet, cautiously throwing a glance at Ralph. She was looking at him with a funny expression on her face that he couldn't decipher. It sent his heart thundering in his chest.

Max sighed, having a very difficult time explaining the situation. Seriously, who was she, Miss-will-hump-anything-with-a-pulse-and-a-Y-chromosome-when-in-heat, to say anything about that?

"The thing is, about love," said Alec, in a low voice, completely serious, "is that you don't need to prove anything with sex. When you love someone…you don't have to have sex to show it or feel it. You don't love someone because you have sex with her. You love her because she's the…best person in the world to you."

Max looked incredulously at Alec. She was blown away by his answer. It was almost…romantic. She felt a slight squeeze in her heart when she realized that he must have been thinking about Rachel Berrisford.

Ralph was nodding along, agreeing with Alec. "And when the time comes…our _friendship_…and _closeness_…and…" she glanced shyly at Bullet, "_love_, will just tell us when the right time is?"

"Yes," both Max and Alec said emphatically.

Bullet smiled broadly, as understanding dawned on him. "Like the two of you!"

"What!"

"No!"

Both Bullet and Ralph leaned against the wall, surprised at the vehemence of their answers. "Oh, sorry…" stammered Bullet.

"Yeah, we thought that you…" explained Ralph. "I mean, you guys are always y'know…_together_…we didn't realize…"

"Yeah…well, we're gonna go now. Thanks!" said Bullet, hastily, figuring they'd just made an already awkward situation and turned it into a circus. "Sorry," he threw out, pulling at Ralph's hand and leaving the small office in a rush.

But Alec grabbed Bullet by the arm on his way out. "Hey! There's one more very important thing…" he paused, not sure how to approach the subject. He decided to just go for it. "Unless you guys are ready for little Ralphs and Bullets running along, I strongly encourage you to consider the world of birth control." He said this with a paternal smile. "And maybe some look into some anti-inflammatory drugs, just in case," he added with a smirk and a casual shrug.

Max glanced over at Alec, surprised by this very practical advice from him. He saw Max's look and shrugged. "What? I'm always prepared for any…uh…opp—whatever."

"Yeah, whatever."

Ralph and Bullet looked a little daunted at the mention of little Ralphs and Bullets. "Uh, okay." Said Ralph, before turning away, embarrassed.

"Drugs?" asked Bullet skeptically.

"Yeah, just go and talk to a responsible adult about 'em." Dismissed Alec.

Max slapped him upside the head, "_We_ are the responsible adults, Alec!"

"Oh, yeah, yeah," he amended. Alec clapped him on the back, a little bit harder than he had to. "Trust me, just go see Mack at MedBay. He'll tell you,"

Bullet and Ralph were looking just a little bit more concerned about taking their relationship a step forward at this point. They glanced at each other and swallowed. "Uh, okay…"

Then Ralph popped her blond head back into the door with a sheepish smile. "And sorry for thinking that you were involved with each other in that way…it was just an assumption." Then she closed the door behind her.

It was a second before Max and Alec turned to face each other. Even without Ralph and Bullet, the small office suddenly felt…too small. Alec filled the entire place with his presence.

"Well, that was interesting," he drawled, his eyes hooded and veiled again.

Max smiled tightly, but glanced away from him. "I hope you don't think…"

"No, of course not," he replied hastily. "I mean, do you…?"

"No!" she cried.

"Good. Glad that that's settled then." He said, his voice just a little bit weary.

He turned around to leave, but she stopped him by laying a small hand on his arm. "Alec, that was a really nice thing you said to them…about love, and all," she whispered. "I guess you really know a little bit about love, huh?"

Alec glanced over to her, letting his eyes roam over her beautiful face. "Yeah, I do," he replied, his voice husky with an undefined emotion. His eyes were glowing more green than hazel as they stared intently into hers.

Max felt heat start to build up beneath her skin, making her body hum with desire. She had to resist the urge to throw herself at him and kiss him senseless. He'd just think she'd gone insane, especially after he'd admitted that he didn't think about them the way Ralph and Bullet had mistakenly thought.

"Okay, then," she said, trying to fill the tense silence between them. "Thanks, I guess."

He nodded stiffly, then reached for the doorknob and opened the door. But before he stepped out, he turned to look at her once more. "Max, have you ever…I mean, y'know…without heat?" he asked. He didn't really expect her to answer him, but he just _had_ to ask. He _had_ to know.

She smiled sadly at him and shook her head no. "I guess, I'm still waiting that someday, I'd get my chance at 'special'."

There was such a longing in her voice that Alec almost went over and kissed her and told her that she was special. That _he_ would make it special.

But no, they weren't like that. They'd just established that today. He sighed, and nodded. "I'm sure you will. And when it comes, I'm sure it'll be perfect."

Then he left her office, a sad smile on his face. _Someday, Max_, he thought to himself, and his smile widened and turned into a grin.

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**A/N 2: Whaddya guys think? Did they give good advice? Hehehe…**


	2. Chapter 2: Alternate Ending

**Disclaimer: Dark Angel doesn't belong to me. This isn't being done for profit, so lay off. I'm stressed.**

**A/N: This was a story that came to me after an enlightening conversation with my fifteen-year-old cousin. I thought it was hilarious. And I tried to recreate it with Max and Alec. Hope you guys enjoy the awkwardness of it all. Please read and review. Oneshot standalone…etc, meaning this is pretty much it.**

**A/N2: Due to people asking for "a kiss" or for a "happy ending" or a "sequel"…I decided to roll everything into one and make an alternate ending. Sort of like those freebies you get in the Special Features when you get a DVD. Maybe I should have a Blooper Reel, too. Ha! Hope this is up to scratch.**

**The Birds and The Bees**

"Umm…Max?"

Max Guevara looked up from the paperwork on her desk and smiled slightly at the owner of the voice. "Yeah, Ralph?"

Ralph, a blond, blue-eyed, young X6 looked shyly at Max. "I…uh, I mean, we…me and Bullet, we got something to ask you…" she stammered.

Max raised her eyebrows in surprise. Ralph was having a hard time looking her in the eye, and she noticed that Bullet, was right behind the young girl, sort of looking down at his feet. She had worked with these kids before, just after Manticore had burned down. She had known them to be self-sufficient and fairly confident in their skills. She wondered what was going down that would make this girl stammer with shyness.

She put down her pen, and pushed the budget reports away from her. "'Bout what?" her tone was a little bit sharper than she had intended, but she was hoping that nothing had gone wrong with the simple heist that she had sent a bunch of X6's on earlier that evening.

"C…could…we come in first?" ventured Ralph.

Max nodded cautiously. Now, she was really starting to worry. What was going on?

The two young transgenics shuffled inside her already small office, making the space seem very tight. Max looked closely at them, marveling at the changes one year had wrought.

Ralph, who had always been quite pretty, was now a certified beauty at age 17. She had let her blond hair grow out, her blue eyes seemed more vivid, and her features more defined. Beside her, Bullet, had grown at least another four inches, skimming six feet, and had started to fill out his once-lanky form.

They had come back from Canada, along with their rag-tag unit, to be in Terminal City. Max hadn't had the heart to turn them away, even though she knew the kids were much safer in Canada.

Max looked at them curiously, slightly apprehensive. "Well? Care to fill me in on what's going on?"

Ralph and Bullet exchanged sheepish glances at each other. Max was surprised to realize that Ralph was actually turning a certain shade of crimson. She was…_blushing?_

Bullet ran a hand through his light brown hair and cleared his throat. "We didn't know who else we could ask…I mean, we've always thought of you as…y'know…our leader…"

"…but also like our big sister," finished Ralph, her eyes glancing hopefully at Max.

Max smiled widely, pleased at this. It was nice to know that people looked up to her as something more than just TC's fearless bitch leader. In fact, it was also a nice feeling not to be the baby all the time, as she was with her unit.

"So…?" she prodded them.

Ralph and Bullet glanced nervously at each other again, making Max want to butt their heads together just so they would get on with it.

"We wanted to ask you about..." started Bullet, but he faltered.

"What we mean is…tell us about…'gettin' busy,'" finished Ralph, her voice coming out in a breathless rush.

Max stared at them in shock. "Gettin' busy?" she asked incredulously. _They couldn't possibly mean… _"Say _what_, again?"

This time, even Bullet had turned scarlet. He ducked his head in embarrassment, and scratched his head. "Umm…y'know…gettin' it on…um…"

"Sex," Ralph blurted out. Then her eyes bugged out and she looked away, her ears were now burning.

Max was floored to say the least. _The two of 'em? Trying to get it on? Shit._

She could only think of one thing to say at that moment. "Wait here, I'm getting Alec."

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"Alec! I want you with me now!" cried Max, kicking his office door open. This time, it was Alec McDowell who had to look up from his paper work, a slow grin of amusement on his face.

"I've been waiting forever for you to say those exact words to me, Maxie," he drawled, as he leaned back casually on his chair.

Max glared at him, "As if!" she spat out. And he just smiled wider. God, she was a sight at the moment. Her bronze skin was slightly flushed, her dark brown eyes were glowing, and she seemed just a little bit agitated. Something was obviously bothering her. _Wait…she couldn't be…_he sniffed the air discreetly…_nope_. She wasn't in heat. He exhaled slightly—he wasn't sure if he was particularly disappointed or relieved.

"Shut up!" she said her tone annoyed.

He raised his arms in mock surrender. "Didn't say anything,"

"Yeah, but you were _thinking_ something," she commented wryly, arching an eyebrow at him. "I know that look."

"Aw, c'mon, Max. Now you're gonna try to tell me to shut my thoughts up, too?"

"If only I could." She retorted.

He shrugged. "Would you believe that I was thinking about the layout plans for next week's heist on the Museum of Modern Art?" he asked innocently.

She frowned at him, her expression conveying that she didn't believe him at all. "Riiight. And I was thinking of getting into a threesome with Jade and Quinn." She drawled sarcastically.

"Well, I _was_ thinking about the museum…" he lied. _Before you walked into my office_. "But your thoughts are way better than mine, Maxie…I mean, who knew what a dirty mind you actually had. In fact, maybe I'd like to up the ante and make it a foursome, hmm?" he finished, smiling suggestively at her.

"Oh, you're sick!" she cried. "I was being sarcastic!"

He smirked at her ire. "Yeah, well, it's not sarcastic anymore, when you have to point out that it was sarcasm. That's just sad."

She glared daggers at him, and he thanked God that he was too far for her to smack. Then Max seemed to sag a little as she sighed loudly. "Actually, that's exactly why I need you to come with me."

"What, that your sarcastic wit sucks and you need lessons?"

This time, she didn't care that there was an entire desk between them. She leaned over and smacked him upside the head. "No, because _you_ have a dirty mind!"

"OW! I was _joking_!" he cried, indignantly, rubbing his ear slightly.

Max stared witheringly at him. "Yeah, well it's not a joke anymore when you have to point it out." She bit out, using his own words.

Alec just chuckled easily. He really loved these strange encounters with Max. She was so easily riled up, so easily ticked off…so easily aroused to…heck, so easily aroused. Period. He wondered if she would be that responsive in bed. He swallowed painfully at the thought, forcing himself to even out his breathing and regulate his blood flow. _Damn, Alec, you know better than to go down that road_.

Max was looking at him oddly. "What's wrong with you? Cat got your tongue?"

"Yeah, something like that," he choked out.

She shrugged, then looked at something that was just over his head. Alec glanced suspiciously over his head. "What?"

"I need you to come with me to my office," she said, her voice small and slightly uncomfortable. "I have a…situation…that might be right up your alley."

He leaned his arms on this desk and peered up at Max—who still wouldn't look him in the eye. What was so interesting about his wall? He smirked at her. "And exactly what is right up my alley?"

Finally, she looked back down at him, her eyes burning fiercely. "Don't make me say it," she said.

"Say what?"

"Sex. Okay? It's right up your alley."

Alec almost fell off his chair. "You want me to go to your office for sex? I mean, shit, we could do it right here, right now, if that's what you want…"

She looked at him incredulously. But she could feel herself getting all hot, her face burning and her skin tingling. "What! No!" she cried out. "I mean…I mean…I need you…to…" she stammered. "I need you to talk to Ralph and Bullet about it."

Alec could barely contain the grin that was pushing its way onto his handsome face. He was vaguely disappointed, but he knew that wasn't what Max had meant. He just liked to rile her. Besides, he already knew Max didn't want him that way.

The way he wanted her.

He felt a little stab in his heart, but let it slide. It wouldn't do him well to dwell on such inevitabilities. He'd learned to live with the strange little friendship he had with Max. It would have to be enough for him.

Then he frowned, slightly. "Why exactly would you think that sex was right up my alley?"

She rolled her eyes at him. "I'd think that the answer would be obvious," she retorted.

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Max finally got Alec to come with her to her office. She was fuming, figuratively and literally. She couldn't believe how _hot_ she'd felt at his words. To top it off, she knew that he had just been kidding, riling her up as usual. And that was what had set her, well…fuming.

She knew she shouldn't have felt that way. It wasn't like they were like _that_. Alec was just an accomplished flirt. He knew exactly what to say to make a woman all self-consciously flustered. That was probably why he had so many women throwing themselves at him.

That, and the fact that he was indecently good-looking. His dark blond hair had grown longer than the Manticore buzz-cut and it curled…for God's sakes it _curled_, in that adorably fly-away fashion that made her just want to run her hands through it and fix it. And those damn hazel-green eyes. All round and beautiful and expressive. Who in the world had the right to eyes like those? And then there were those chiseled lips. Yes, _chiseled_. Max had snuck in a few romance novel reading time (a girl's gotta get her fix somehow), every time she ran past the line "chiseled lips", Alec's lips would pop into her mind. Now, _those_ were chiseled lips. Take that Duke of Something or Other.

Max sighed wearily at her thoughts. Whatever she may feel about Alec, she was physically attracted to him. It wasn't necessarily a bad thing. Except for the fact that she knew he didn't feel the same way. He always had a different woman with him every night, either transgenic or ordinary. But he always held _her_ an arm's length away. Well, maybe it was because she smacked him so many times, but really, he was always asking for it with his stupid comments.

"So, what exactly do you want me to tell them?" he asked, as he followed closely behind her.

She shrugged and looked back at him. "I dunno. Maybe about how it's something special and all that…"

"Are you nuts!" Alec paused in his walking. "I'm not exactly the best spokesperson for the "special" and "intimate" part of having sex, especially after you've showed me how _obvious_ it was that sex was right up my alley," he pointed out.

Max turned around and faced him, her arms crossed over her chest. "You're the expert at this."

"I don't know if I should be insulted," he said dryly, "or complimented that I'd be such an _expert_."

Max rolled her eyes, even though he couldn't see. "I meant expert at _yapping_," she snapped. "Honestly, just tell 'em what they wanna hear. Like how good it's supposed to feel, and all."

"As opposed to how 'not good' it _actually_ feels?" he quipped, picking up on her use of the word 'supposed'.

"Whatever!"

"Max, I dunno who you've been with, but I can tell you, that they must've been seriously lacking to satisfy your…uh…nature."

She turned around and punched him on the stomach. Hard.

He doubled over in pain. Gasping. "What the hell--?"

"Shut-up!" Then she spun around quickly, whipping his incredulous face with her long hair.

He flinched, but followed her to her office.

They got there and found Ralph and Bullet standing nervously against one wall. They snapped to attention at the entrance of their senior officers.

"At ease, kids," said Alec. "This ain't Manticore."

They looked up at Alec, and Ralph blushed. He had that effect on the entire female population, apparently. Max almost rolled her eyes, but stopped herself. She was supposed to be a role model after all.

"So," started Alec, as he shut the door behind him. "What exactly is this all about?"

"Well, sir, we wanted to know about sex," started Bullet.

Alec nodded understandingly. "Are you two…together, or something?"

Ralph blushed prettily. "Yes, sir." She said, then glanced swiftly, uncertainly at Bullet. But Bullet just smiled at her and nodded in the affirmative.

Max thought that it was so sweet. She felt a small pang in her heart. She'd really missed out on young love, what with all the running and hiding and all. And then, there was Logan.

Which had turned out to be a bust. They had drawn out the waiting part so long, that in the end, even with the virus cured, they just didn't have the sizzle anymore. They were as flat as days old soda. Needless to say, they had parted amiably and had stayed friends.

Unfortunately, Logan had moved on with Asha…and she had been left to sneak in romance novels in her spare time.

"We were not of age to be informed of the rites of copulation while at Manticore, sir," explained Bullet.

Alec raised his eyebrows. "First of all, drop the sir. And secondly, I guess we'd have to start from the beginning," he sighed. He shoved his hands down his pants pockets and rocked on his heels. He suddenly didn't know what else to say. _How to begin_…he glanced swiftly at Max.

"I'm assuming you guys know the basics…right? The birds and the bees?" she ventured into the conversation.

Ralph shrugged. "We had sex education at the age of twelve. We were taught about sperm, ovulation, fertilization and the development of embryos. We were taught of certain…characteristics of the male and female anatomy and their designated functions."

"Huh."

"Right. But you were too young to be initiated into the Breeding Program, I understand," said Alec.

"There was no Breeding Program until after we blew up the lab," pointed out Max.

"Yeah, but the rest of us had outside mission _perks_…" explained Alec. "I mean, when our handlers thought we were ready, we were, uh, _exposed_ to the _practice_ to develop the _know_-_how_ in case it was ever significant in a mission."

Max looked at him with something akin to disgust on her face. "Well, what was _your_ first time like?" he asked pointedly.

Max had the decency to look away. "It should've been special," she said, in a voice so low, only Alec who was standing right next to her heard. He glanced sharply down at the wistfulness in her voice. What did she mean by that?

Then she looked keenly at the two X6's. "If you two are sure about this…"

Bullet and Ralph glanced uneasily at each other, and nodded.

"…then, I think that the way it goes is to just follow your instincts." She finished.

Alec was nodding along, but kept his gaze on Max. She was looking a little sad, and for the life of him, he didn't understand why.

"If you trust each other, then that's all that matters," she was continuing. "Because that means that you'll want it to be…perfect. I mean, my first time was…nothing."

"What do you mean?" asked Ralph.

"I was fourteen, and well, I was in heat," explained Max, her voice calm and soft. Alec's irises widened slightly. _Fourteen? She had been fourteen? Damn._ But he kept his incredulous thoughts to himself.

"What's heat?" asked Ralph, curiously.

"It's something that Manticore fixed with you guys X6 series and up, but all X5 females go into 'heat'—as a result of the cat DNA. It's basically the reproductive cycle kicking in. It only happens a few times each year, about three or four times," explained Alec in an oddly paternal Discovery Channel kind of tone.

"So…what does that have anything to do with sex?"

"It basically means that I _crave_ it…and can't really control myself. I never had anyone tell me what was going on with my body…and what these feelings were. Next thing, I knew, I'd jumped a guy and lost my virginity." She smiled regretfully at the memory.

Alec just looked at Max, an odd expression on his face. His eyes were slightly shuttered, like he was hiding some emotion behind their green gold depths.

Max swallowed and looked away from himm. "Not to say, that it didn't feel good…" she faltered.

Luckily, Alec happily jumped into the conversation. "Yeah, because the best part about…doing it…" he said, a smirk on his face. Then he glanced down at Max, and added, "…with someone you _care_ about," he almost choked on the words. "…is that it feels good."

Then he smirked that Alec smirk again, "It feels _real_ good."

"Yeah, but don't just do it for the heck of it," Max butt in hastily, before Alec could give them bad tom-cat advice.

"What do you mean don't do it for the heck of it. You just told the kids it felt good. What's wrong with experiencing the pleasure as much as they can?" asked Alec, a small frown marring his perfect features.

Max groaned. "I meant, don't get pressured into doing it, just 'cuz you think you ought to be at this point in your relationship. It has to feel right."

"So, you're saying that we should…love…each other first?" asked Bullet, cautiously throwing a glance at Ralph. She was looking at him with a funny expression on her face that he couldn't decipher. It sent his heart thundering in his chest.

Max sighed, having a very difficult time explaining the situation. Seriously, who was she, Miss-will-hump-anything-with-a-pulse-and-a-Y-chromosome-when-in-heat, to say anything about that?

"The thing is, about love," said Alec, in a low voice, completely serious, "is that you don't need to prove anything with sex. When you love someone…you don't have to have sex to show it or feel it. You don't love someone because you have sex with her. You love her because she's the…best person in the world to you."

Max looked incredulously at Alec. She was blown away by his answer. It was almost…romantic. She felt a slight squeeze in her heart when she realized that he must have been thinking about Rachel Berrisford.

Ralph was nodding along, agreeing with Alec. "And when the time comes…our _friendship_…and _closeness_…and…" she glanced shyly at Bullet, "_love_, will just tell us when the right time is?"

"Yes," both Max and Alec said emphatically.

Bullet smiled broadly, as understanding dawned on him. "Like the two of you!"

"What!"

"No!"

Both Bullet and Ralph leaned against the wall, surprised at the vehemence of their answers. "Oh, sorry…" stammered Bullet.

"Yeah, we thought that you…" explained Ralph. "I mean, you guys are always y'know…_together_…we didn't realize…"

"Yeah…well, we're gonna go now. Thanks!" said Bullet, hastily, figuring they'd just made an already awkward situation and turned it into a circus. "Sorry," he threw out, pulling at Ralph's hand and leaving the small office in a rush.

But Alec grabbed Bullet by the arm on his way out. "Hey! There's one more very important thing…" he paused, not sure how to approach the subject. He decided to just go for it. "Unless you guys are ready for little Ralphs and Bullets running along, I strongly encourage you to consider the world of birth control." He said this with a paternal smile. "And maybe look into anti-inflammatory drugs, just in case," he added with a smirk and a casual shrug.

Max glanced over at Alec, surprised by this very practical advice from him. He saw Max's look and shrugged. "What? I'm always prepared for any…uh…opp—whatever."

"Yeah, whatever."

Ralph and Bullet looked a little daunted at the mention of little Ralphs and Bullets. "Uh, okay." Said Ralph, before turning away, embarrassed.

"Drugs?" asked Bullet skeptically.

"Yeah, just go and talk to a responsible adult about 'em." Dismissed Alec.

Max slapped him upside the head, "_We_ are the responsible adults, Alec!"

"Oh, yeah, yeah," he amended. Alec clapped him on the back, a little bit harder than he had to. "Trust me, just go see Mack at MedBay. He'll tell you,"

Bullet and Ralph were looking just a little bit more concerned about taking their relationship a step forward at this point. They glanced at each other and swallowed. "Uh, sure…"

Then Ralph popped her blond head back into the door with a sheepish smile. "And sorry for thinking that you were involved with each other in that way…it was just an assumption. I mean, a lot of people…nevermind." Then she closed the door behind her.

It was a second before Max and Alec turned to face each other. Even without Ralph and Bullet, the small office suddenly felt…too small. Alec filled the entire place with his presence.

"Well, that was interesting," he drawled, his eyes hooded and veiled again.

Max shivered slightly at his husky, unintentionally sexy voice. "Yeah…" she chuckled a bit. "I hope they work it out."

"Mm-hmm." Alec just continued to look at her in the indecipherable way. She felt hunted…trapped…caught. But it was also a heady feeling, making her want to surrender instead of run away. Her heart was pounding so hard that she was sure he could see her pulse beating at the base of her neck. He took a step closer to her, and she backed up, until the back of her leg bumped against her desk. _Stupid small office_, she thought warily.

Max smiled tightly, but glanced away from him. "I hope you don't think…"

"No, of course not," he replied hastily, looking away from her, breaking the tension. "I mean, do you…?"

"No!" she cried.

"Good. Glad that that's settled then." He said, his voice just a little bit weary.

He turned around to leave, but she stopped him by laying a small hand on his arm. "Alec, that was a really nice thing you said to them…about love, and all," she whispered. "I guess you really know a little bit about love, huh?"

Alec glanced over to her, letting his eyes roam over her beautiful face. "Yeah, I do," he replied, his voice husky with an undefined emotion. His eyes were glowing more green than hazel as they stared intently into hers.

Max felt heat start to build up beneath her skin, making her body hum with desire. She had to resist the urge to throw herself at him and kiss him senseless. He'd just think she'd gone insane, especially after he'd admitted that he didn't think about them the way Ralph and Bullet had mistakenly thought.

"Okay, then," she said, trying to fill the tense silence between them. "Thanks, I guess."

He nodded stiffly, then reached for the doorknob and opened the door. But before he stepped out, he turned to look at her once more. "Max, have you ever…I mean, y'know…without heat?" he asked. He didn't really expect her to answer him, but he just _had_ to ask. He _had_ to know.

She smiled sadly at him and shook her head no. "I guess, I'm still waiting that someday, I'd get my chance at 'special'."

There was such a longing in her voice that Alec almost went over and kissed her and told her that she was special. That _he_ would make it special.

What the hell, she could always kick his ass later.

He strode over to her in two long strides, gathered her into his arms and kissed her.

He kissed her with all the pent-up longing he'd felt for her since he'd met her. He held her by the back of her head, angling her so that he could taste all of her. He pulled her body flush against his, almost lifting her off the floor.

Max was stunned at first, but when she felt his hard body against hers, she lost all coherence, and melted against him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, her fingers tangling in his hair. She stood on tiptoe and offered more of herself and took more of him.

Max moaned as she felt herself burning, her body responding to this man almost past the point of bearing. She tore her lips away from him, and Alec groaned in disappointment. He fully expected her to break free from their embrace and slap him.

But Max did neither. She stayed locked in his embrace, leaning her head against his shoulder, dangerously close to his thundering heart. Hell, she couldn't miss all the signs of his arousal at that point. His skin was so hot, his heart was going a mile a second, his breathing was ragged…and there was one more very obvious result pressed against her.

"Alec…?" she whispered against his neck.

"Hmm?" he acknowledged cautiously, still holding her, just reveling in the fact that she was still molded perfectly against him. He was terrified that she'd come to her senses any second now and break his heart into a million pieces.

"Are we…friends?" she asked tentatively. Max was feeling vulnerable. She didn't have very many friends to begin with, and she didn't know just what had happened between her and Alec, but she was afraid that they had just ruined that indefinable relationship that they had.

Alec closed his eyes painfully at her questions. _Friends? Damn. Damn. Damn!_ He tightened his hold on her reflexively, and she didn't protest. He would tell her the truth.

"Best friends, Max. You're my best friend," he sighed, a note of defeat in his tone. "I know we don't act like it, but I know you got my back and I got yours. You've seen me at my weakest and I've seen you at yours. In all the things that matter, I know I can turn to you," he whispered.

Max was stunned to hear that she was his best friend. _Who would have thought?_ But maybe, that was why he was always around to help her. And why she always thought to go to him first when things were rough. She smiled slightly at the thought. Yeah, he was her best friend, too. _And something more_.

She pushed away from him slightly. And Alec almost cried 'No, not yet!', but he released his hold. Funny, but Max kept her hand on his chest, just over his heart.

"So, what was all this about?" she asked cautiously, afraid that the answer would be something flippant and completely Alec-like.

Alec tried to smile, but failed, his expression breaking at the attempt. So he ran his hand through his tousled hair and pursed his lips ruefully. "This was insanity," he said. He saw her expression fall. And he realized he couldn't stand that look. He already had one foot in his grave anyway, might as well jump in. "Max, ever heard the saying "_Give her two red roses, each with a note…one says, 'For the woman I love.' And the other says, 'To my best friend_.'? Well, you're that woman to me."

He took a deep steadying breath. He was either going to heaven or to hell in the next second.

Max was quiet for a moment, looking at her hand over his chest, at the rightness of it. She couldn't believe what he had just told her. _Did that mean_?…she smiled. She looked up at him and saw him catch his breath.

Alec saw the strange Mona Lisa smile on Max's face and he wanted to just beat the answer out of her. Shake her to her senses and yell, _Yes or no, Max? Love me or leave me, Max? Tell me, Max!_

She curved her arms around his neck again, and she leaned up on her tiptoes towards him. "Glad you feel that way, McDowell. Because I was having this sinking feeling that you were the best person in the world to me," she whispered, before pressing her lips against his.

They kissed each other, this time with the growing wonder of knowing that the person in their arms was one that they loved.

They broke off a few minutes later, hot and bothered. "D'you think that our _friendship_…and _closeness_…and _love_…are telling us it's the right time?" he whispered jokingly into her ear.

Max chuckled. "Don't you think we ought to talk to a responsible adult first?" she quipped back.

Alec growled and pulled her into his arms. "_We_ are the responsible adults, Max," he whispered roughly. "I'm always prepared."

"Really?" she asked in mock disbelief.

He picked her up in his arms. "Oh yes, really. Now, let's go show those kids what 'special' is really all about when it comes to the birds and the bees."

Max laid a hand on his cheek. "Special? You promise?"

"Max, with you, it can't be anything but special. 'Sides, I'm the expert, here, remember?"

With that, she smacked him upside the head. He just laughed as he whisked her away to his place to make good on his promise.

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**A/N 2: Hoped you like it. I actually wrote this really quickly and personally liked the first ending better.**

**But y'know, I've always liked angst and cliff-hangers, even in my own stories. **

**Tell me what you guys thought, please! Read and Review and Compare! C'mon, it'll be fun!**


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